"Y'All Jus' Jellus!" The Scary World of Fandom

[Deleted]

Well, if you combine fandom and religious belief, you get Biblical slash.

Holy christ! What the fuck? Whyyyyy?

From that site:

I'd like to say that I hope no one is offended by my mention of Pope John Paul II, since it is *way* before the slashiness and I really am mourning his passing.
Title: The Sinner
Rating: PG-13 for slash, mild violence and implied rape
Pairing: Lucifer/Raphael, possible Michael/Raphael

Hello all. I finally broke down and joined this community after realizing my insane need to slash Jesus with either Judas (though kind of one-sided, on Judas' part)

Wow. Just wow. Nex to this, writing about rape and Orlando Bloom almost seem normal. This is probably the sickest, weirdest obsession I've ever heard of. I feel like bleaching my brain just from looking at the front page.

Even though this thread can be highly disturbing, at least it leaves me feeling normal about my own fandoms. What a prize to pay, though.

ETA:

Title: Galilee
Pairing: Jesus/JC Chasez
Rating: PG-13, maybe R
Warnings: A handjob from Jesus?
Summary: JC doesn't know what love is, and Jesus is spread too thin.

I'm laughing AND crying right now. These people got to be kidding, right? I haven't dared to read any of the stories, but it seems pretty serious....

[pepper67]

ane, I haven't dared read any of the stories either (not that I even want to) but...who'd do this as a joke?? I mean, I didn't think anyone would do it for real but it seems even more bizarre if it's supposed to be a joke.

The thing that did surprise me was the first story that mentioned being in mourning for Pope John Paul II. I kinda assumed they had to be anti-religion simply because of the content.

[snacktastic]

dude, it must be a joke. Here is a sample:

“Looks like your God has abandoned you little angel.”<br>“God Has NOT abandoned me.” Raphael gasped as the aura tightened around him, swirling closer to his core. “Get *off* me Lucifael!”<br>“This is not like the wrestling we used to do Raphael. You cannot simply order me off.” Lucifer lightly stroked Raphael’s cheek and the angel gasped in realization. “Do you remember the nights we spent together? The fun we had as we reveled in the light and,” at this he sneered, “God’s Love. Do you remember the heights I drove you to my dearest healer? The lust I made you feel?”<br>“Lust is a sin! I was in LOVE!” Raphael spat out and Lucifer’s grin hardened.
“Lust is a sin little angel, and I am a terrible sinner. Make me repent?” And Lucifer’s power sharpened holding Raphael in the earthly plain, in the Devil’s control, while his hands wandered over the other angel’s corporeal body. “Or will you dive into sin with me?”<br>When Michael found Raphael later, curled up on the Italian countryside with blood and dirt marring his pristine clothes and shining body he swore to get back at whatever demonic creature had made this sweet hearted angel bleed.

Or is slash usually this stupid, because I don't read it (and if it is, I reverse any defense I ever made of slash)

Btw. Alot them seem to have an albino fetish.

[Deleted]

As a fairly experienced slash reader, I have to say that I would never EVER spend my time reading it if it was as bad as that crap. I've never even understood those who read / write real people slash. Angel slash? Devil slash? *shudder*

And you're right, Pepper67. It looks too serious to be a joke. Sweet Jesus, that site is scary. And so... out there.

[roseland]

See, I think the existence of that slash is proof that God does not exist. Because if I was God and someone was writing such bad slash about my angels, I would so smite them.

[Deleted]

Those people are going to Hell in the most hilarious way possible.

[valueofaloonie]

I might be a very bad Catholic, but I feel the need to go to confession after seeing that.

I just...cannot wrap my mind around that. Which is good, since I don't particularly want to.

[foxyepicurean]

Going to Hell in the most hilarious way possible.

Daaaamn, I need this t-shirt!

[snacktastic]

What is weird about angel slash is that aren't archangels supposed to sexless, like literally without sexual organs?

[Deleted]

Bible slash....now that's a first. You have to admit though it is kind of original.

I come from a conservative christian background and while I found some of the stories peculiar (I read the Jesus/JC Chasez tale), I wasn't repelled. I wonder what inspires people to write Bible Slash in particular? Are some of you really that grossed out by this? If so why?

It is kind of intriguing.