Irregardless, Grammar is our Friend

[vacationland]

Your professor was misinformed, Moldy. It's not a conjunction (thus not a straight substitute for "but"). It's a conjunctive adverb, a word that separates independent clauses. In most cases, it'll take a semicolon, but if if it's separating two ideas within a single thought, commas are okay...and the word can appear in the middle of a sentence, uncapitalized.

These examples are all correct:

Cletus wanted to buy more Red Bull and Cheetos; however, Brandine wanted wine coolers and pork rinds for a change.

Either repulsive combination of snack foods, however, was acceptable to America's favorite low-rent lovebirds.

They bought some of everything. However, Cletus refused to eat the pork rinds.

"They'll wreck my abs, yo," explained Cletus to his indifferent wife. She, however, could not hear him over the crunch of the pork rinds and Cheetos in her mouth.

Here's a link that explains the usage pretty well.

[Karrit]

Bonsai, your explanation using the name Linda cracked me up. I have a friend Linda who stayed with me for a while in her transition move from New England to LA. All the messages for her on the answering machine began "Linder are you there?" (We were big-time screeners)

We now call her Linder!

[Deleted]

The mispronunciation that irks me the most is "excape" instead of "escape." There is no x in that word, people!

Word. And while we're at it, there is no X in "espresso"!

[messageunit]

There have been a couple pop songs that I have to turn off as soon as they come on the radio because they don't use the subjunctive properly. It grates on my ears to no end. The most famous was "What if God was one of us," but there's also Clay's "If I was invisible." People! If you're talking about a theoretical situation, you have to use the subjunctive. It's were, not was!

I do know from awful experience that most of my fellow doctors are not the greatest writers. My pet medical peeve is the creeping use of "coronary heart disease," which is replacing "coronary artery disease." What does coronary mean? Of or related to the heart. So now we are all sitting around discussing "heart heart disease" and it drives me nuts. I also hate the colloquial use of "female" for women, since I was taught that female refers to animals. That's probably a preference, rather than a rule.

Far too many inappropriate homonym substitutions going on these days, too. Why doesn't Congress pass a bill about that?

[dwanollah]

Today give me an excuse to bitch about people who shriek "APRIL FOOL'S!" when they trick someone.

No. It's "April fool!" you tards! Guh!

[banky]

I have to admit, I am confused about the "effect" vs. "affect" thing. Whenever it actually matters (at work, etc.), I generally avoid using either word - just in case!

Just remember that "effect" is always a noun, and "affect" is always a verb. So you have an effect on something, but your actions affect others. That's all there is to it.

[vacationland]

Just remember that "effect" is always a noun, and "affect" is always a verb. So you have an effect on something, but your actions affect others. That's all there is to it.

...unless you're a psychiatrist (or are writing about psychology). In that case, you might use "affect" to describe someone's mental state ("He had a flat affect and appeared to be suffering from clinical depression.") To make this quirky little exception to the rule even more fun, when affect is used as a noun, it's pronounced with the emphasis on the first syllable...sorta like "Affleck" (as in Ben).

But banky is right, the affect=verb/effect=noun is a pretty good general rule.

Add me to the "eye-ther" camp...but that's the way most people I grew up around said it. I think it could be a regional (New England) thing, 'cause that pronunciation is common here. I'll even say "nigh-ther" (also a common local pronunciation)...except when paired with "me" when I'm agreeing with someone. Then it's "Me nee-ther." Never heard anyone say "Me nigh-ther."

Eh. Eee-ther, eye-ther, nee-ther, nigh-ther, let's call the whole thing off.

[kaylee]

Word. And while we're at it, there is no X in "espresso"!

When I was a waitress and someone ordered an expresso, some part of me always wanted to respond 'we don't serve that here'. Luckily not many people in Australia call it 'espresso' but 'short black'.

[Bruins07]

The adding the inappropriate "R" at the end of a word is very New England and I myself have to monitor my speech carefully to avoid it.

I love how New Englanders add an "r" on some words. I think it's cute. During the election last year, I was always amused whenever Kerry would say "idear" instead of "idea." After a while, he tried to prevent saying that but there were times when it slipped out.

[e c0li]

YES! I work in a coffee bar, and people always say "eXpresso" and it makes me want to pour their $2.00 shot of "eXpresso" on them. I also hate when people call it "Kai" instead of "Chai". Some words are actually meant to be prounounced the way they are spelled.

One last thing: I hate it when people say "Where's my coat at?" Why is "at" necessary? Couldn't one just stop with "where's my coat?" I currently live in Indiana, and I've never heard "at" used so zealously in my life.