Diana, Princess of Wales (UK)

[Aspasia]

roseland said:

Dude, how awesome would it have been if she'd really done that? That would have made my decade.


I don't know. I'm always a little suspicious of this laundry list. I mean, she was bulimic, she admitted that. But so are a lot of people who manage to have happy, healthy relationships. As for suspicion, paranoia, persitent feelings of emptiness and serious depression, well, hell, I think she was entitled considering the situation she was in. She was locked away, pretty much, from any real relationships. Her husband couldn't stand her and openly mocked her and her position, her in-laws barely tolerated her, she was surrounded by people who were either her employees or had something to gain from the friendship -- none of this was conducive to a happy, mental state. And all of these, except the bulemia, can be traced back to Charles.

On another note entirely, I never thought Diana was beautiful. she was average looking as far as I was concerned. I did like how she made herself over and the work she did for various charities. I think her touching that AIDs patient did more to alleviate people's worries about normal contact with people with AIDs than all the pamphlets that were ever printed.

Great post...my thoughts too.

[azaleaqueen]

Okay, I'm sure Diana's childhood was shitty. She was supposed to have been a boy, and I don't imagine her parents ever let her forget it. Then, they divorced, and that's always hard on kids. Then, when she supposedly was finding happiness, the man who was supposed to love her more than anything treated her like dirt. We have no idea what went on between closed doors with those two. There is no doubt in my mind that Charles and the Queen can be cruel when they want to be. But she seemed to rise, at least on the surface, to every occasion. She was a fashion statement on the hoof in a bunch of frumps. She was lovely and charming amid snoots. She provided the royal family with an heir and a spare. And what she got in return was infidelity from her husband and coldness from the rest of his family.

We've discussed on the Princess Caroline thread how all that money doesn't seem to buy her happiness. Maybe the same was true for Diana. And I have to wonder if Camilla will be happy now that she is truly a member of the royal family and must conduct herself accordingly.

End of rant. Carry on.

[roseland]

I never really buy into all the "she had wealth, fame and the adoration of millions of strangers so why couldn't she be happy?" Because none of that causes happiness after the first flush of achieving it is over. And her unhappiness wasn't just because one man didn't love her. It was that she was surrounded by people who were either indifferent to her or treated her with contempt. She was placed in an artificial situation where her every move was scrutinized, where royal handlers were on her case day in and day out about mistakes she made and she had no emotional support from anyone. She was a 19-year old girl left adrift and having to deal with an incredible life changing experience as well as finding out that the man you love, not only doesn't love you but loves another woman and doesn't even have the decency to try and hide it from you. I defy anyone to be placed in that situation and say "Oh well, la-di-da, at least I've got my tiara and all the latest fashions."

[Deleted]

roseland said:

I never really buy into all the "she had wealth, fame and the adoration of millions of strangers so why couldn't she be happy?" Because none of that causes happiness after the first flush of achieving it is over.

I read about a study that really backs up what you're saying. It was about people who, while maybe not flat-out poor, were used to dealing with money problems and attributed their unhappiness to that. The study found that people like that who suddenly found themselves wealthy -- say, through marrying into money, winning the lottery, getting an inheritence or whatever -- would be happier at first, but it wouldn't last. They would gradually fall back into their moody or unhappy patterns. I guess the point of the study was that you are what you are: If you're a moody or pessimistic person, money isn't going to change that.

[Deleted]

roseland said:

And all of these, except the bulemia, can be traced back to Charles.

Even the bulimia can be traced to Charles. The story goes that he put his arm around her waist and said "Getting a bit chubby, are we?" That is the trigger that set her off on the binging and purging. He would even taunt her at the dinner table and say: "Oh, I guess we'll be seeing that again later on."

Diana talking about the bulimia,

excerpted from the BBC interview.

[Deleted]

I never really buy into all the "she had wealth, fame and the adoration of millions of strangers so why couldn't she be happy?" Because none of that causes happiness after the first flush of achieving it is over.

I never said all the wealth fame etc. would bring HAPPINESS. I was trying to say that when you truly start to APPRECIATE all the fabulous things you have and were given... then maybe you will be grateful and a little less depressed about your life. It's an attitude, I guess.

So this quote from Roseland may be very true about her:

I guess the point of the study was that you are what you are: If you're a moody or pessimistic person, money isn't going to change that.

[roseland]

I was trying to say that when you truly start to APPRECIATE all the fabulous things you have and were given... then maybe you will be grateful and a little less depressed about your life. It's an attitude, I guess.

Yes, but depression can also be caused by a chemical imbalance so it doesn't matter what you have or how much appreciation you know you should have, your body just isn't cooperating. Diana was also in a position where going to a therapist was probably unheard of so she couldn't even get medical treatment for her condition.

[Deleted]

She actually went to dozens of "alternative" therapists, including an energy healer, 3 astrologists, spiritualists, tarot card readers, a hypnotherapist, an "anger-release" therapist, colonic irrigationists, osteopaths, chiropractors, reflexologists, aromatherapists, shiatsu and tai chi chuan experts, acupuncturists, and a "mind-body" therapist.

You're right, she needed a good shrink... but apparently Diana had a mistrust of general psychiatry.

[Binky]

I've always thought that had she lived, Di would have tarnished her Princess image. Given the increasing scope of the paparazzi, we would have seen more of her spending time on yachts with boytoys than doing charity work. I'm not saying she would have stopped the charity work, just that the public view of her would have been less controlled. She probably would have adopted a kid from a third world country - basically become Angelina Jolie without the shitty movies. I think her neurosis would have become a lot more obvious as she was really becoming a celebrity rather than a royal. More gossip would have come out and she wouldn't have been Saint Diana anymore.

I do think she had tons of mental problems, likely worsened by her marriage but not exclusively caused by it. I don't think she was totally innocent in the nightmare marriage.

What would have been nice is either she or Charles realizing that he loved Camilla and calling off the wedding. I do think Charles loved the idea of Diana - young, beautiful, popular, worshipful of him. Then, he married her and realized he wanted Camilla as a wife not a mistress, and that Diana was more popular than he was and that he couldn't have the type of marriage she wanted. Charles should have married Camilla 20 years ago. He could have had an affair with Diana. That probably would worked for everyone except the two Princes not ever being conceived.

What I wonder the most is, had Di not been killed, how would the Princes be different today? I think she was a different kind of insane (as opposed to the Windsor-brand of insane) influence on them. I don't know if they'd be any brighter (Harry and the Nazi costume...). They might be warmer. Or they might be resentful of seeing their mother's chain of boyfriends in the press. I don't know.

[azaleaqueen]

Maybe if Camilla had kept her legs crossed once in a while and not slept with everything male that functioned, QEII would've okayed the marriage between her and Chuckie.

I don't blame her for the breakup of C&D. She was just doing what she'd always done. Diana had problems, and was too young and naive to know how to handle her situation after she married Charles.