Worst Films of the Decade

[Hamatron]

I will second Battlefield Earth. I love watching awful movies with friends and some beer. We thought this one would crack us up and be epic. It was so bad we turned it off about a half hour in. I felt embarrassed for all the people involved, but especially John Travolta. It was like watching some sort of Scientology Power Rangers (like, it was the level of acting used on campy children's TV) , only way way way worse.

[kostgard]

Battlefield Earth is so bad that when I caught it on cable a few years back, it took me about 15 minutes to realize that I was watching it in Spanish. It is so mind-meltingly bad that I didn't even realize that everyone wasn't speaking English. Once I realized it, I turned it over to the English version of the cable channel, then ended up turning it off about 5 minutes later, because being able to understand what they were saying only made it worse.

The worst movie I've ever seen in its entirety is a piece of shit called "Pathology" that starred Peter Petrelli from Heroes. Oh. My. God. After watching it I wanted to punch my family in the mouth for renting that turd. Then I wanted to punch everyone who was involved with making that movie in the mouth as well. I think I ranted about it somewhere on this site when I was forced to watch it, so I won't repeat it, but...damn. It is a REALLY bad movie.

[hushhush]

Jan 23, 2010 22:17:17 GMT -4 @dguzpy said:

I've seen it described as a feature-length "Seinfeld" episode and that's absolutely true. Short, schlubby guy (George) and his taller, better-looking, show biz friend (Jerry) head off on a pointless adventure. Really, picture the movie in your mind and swap in Jerry and George for Thomas Haden Church and Paul Giammatti. It's the same thing.

I can definitely see that, and that could be part of the problem. I did enjoy Seinfeld, but for me it was a show that was funny for 20 minutes once a week.

Remember all of those SNL skits that they tried to make into movies? All of them (except for Wayne's World) were horribly unfunny bombs. That material was funny as sketch comedy, but not as a movie. Ditto Sideways! That Giamatti-Hayden Church shtick might have been funny for half an hour, but as an hour and a half movie I found it pretty excruciating.

[azaleaqueen]

My humblest apologies for getting Craven and Raimi mixed up.

I'm on the hating Sideways bandwagon. BORING!!!

I also found Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind or whateverthehell it was called boring.

I have to tell a story. I used to be a huge fan of Russell Crowe. (Still think he can act, Just a nasty person.) Anyway, I bought a copy of ABM when it came out on DVD, so I could watch it again and again, which I did. Anyway, I made a trip to Australia in December 2005. Changed planes in Dallas and the in-flight movie to San Francisco was--you guessed it. Then, on the interminable flight to Sydney, one of the 3 movies was--right again. I came home on January 2 and the flight attendant announced that they were using the December lineup so, guess what? I don't even remember what the movie between SF and Dallas was, but I'm guessing it was ABM. I haven't watched it since.

Edited because I forgot to add that I hated the Johnny Depp version of Sweeney Todd.

[Neurochick]

Jan 23, 2010 21:29:03 GMT -4 hushhush said:

Sideways


For a true worst of the decade, Lady In the Water - Oh, what utter drivel that was! I tried to watch some of that movie on TV one evening just to see how bad it really was. I only lasted about an hour, and I actually LIKE to snark on bad movies! It was soooo, sooooooo bad.

I've never been able to sit though this movie, and I've tried about FOUR TIMES. Each time it seems to get worse if that's possible.

I want to nominate Lost in Translation because I don't get why it was supposed to be so wonderful. I''d rather watch Attack of the Clones a zillion times in a row than watch this movie a second time.

[azaleaqueen]

I forgot about Lost in Translation too. Boring as hell. Plus the fact that I can't stand ScarJo and Bill Murray played himself. That was okay for Ghostbusters, but not for something that eaarned him an Oscar nom.

[Smilla]

Forgot one--Darkness Falls. As I once posted on the Old Board--is it possible to be derivative...of derivation? It's like the writers couldn't even pretend to put any non-generic horror movie cliches in there. At one point, the main character refers to the "5 and Dime" in their "hometown" as "the 5 and Dime." ACK. I'm glad it was just a renter for me.

[Neurochick]

I have two more.

X Files: I Want To Believe, or whatever it was called, the last X Files movie made.

The Fog. Truly one of the worst things I've ever seen on a screen (thank God I saw it on cable) ever.

[Deleted]

Jan 24, 2010 22:22:30 GMT -4 Hamatron said:

I will second Battlefield Earth. I love watching awful movies with friends and some beer. We thought this one would crack us up and be epic. It was so bad we turned it off about a half hour in. I felt embarrassed for all the people involved, but especially John Travolta. It was like watching some sort of Scientology Power Rangers (like, it was the level of acting used on campy children's TV) , only way way way worse.

It is awful but with a lot of pot it transforms itself into the greatest movie ever made. I have seen it twice stoned and was in hysterics both times. Watching it sober though? No fucking way.

[Mutagen]

Jan 26, 2010 11:16:08 GMT -4 Neurochick said:

I have two more.

X Files: I Want To Believe, or whatever it was called, the last X Files movie made.

Sorry for the multiple exclamation points, but holy hell, that movie blew chunks!!! It wasn't just that it felt like a really long episode of the show - it would have been a really bad episode of the show. And I didn't really appreciate the evil gay couple and the pedophile priest angles being used for shock value (that's how it felt to me, anyway).

When Xzhibit is the main bright spot in your movie, you have a problem. He wasn't even particularly great (although he did moderately surpass my expectations at least), but at least I could have fun with the "Yo dawg, I heard you like aliens" meme playing in the back of my mind.