Empire

[Neurochick]

Personally, I doubt Murdoch even knows what's going on with Fox TV, or FX or FXX. He probably just says, "Are we making money? If so then it's all good."

BTW, I only watched "Black-ish" once and hated it because I can't stand Anthony Anderson.

I posted this in PreviouslyTV, but you guys have the right to laugh at it too.

From our favorite rag, the Daily Fail Mail of course.

For a good laugh.

[iClaudia]

I just binge watched the entire season and, much to my surprise, I enjoyed every minute of it. I've never really been a nighttime soap person and I had reservations about stereotypical representations, so I was predisposed to not like it, but it totally sold me. What's interesting to me is that the first TV character I thought of when watching Henson's "Cookie," was Suzanne Sugarbaker. Totally OTT and unbelievable yet endearing precisely because of that fact. Neurochick's "Game of Thrones" comparison is spot on. While there are elements of the characters' histories that are true to life and gut wrenching (I am particularly impressed with how Jamal's story has been handled), in the end it's all fantasy. It works because it's so far out there. My only real beef is with the pacing of the show - they were on overdrive. What happened in the first 11 episodes could have spanned three seasons. Hopefully, now that it's a hit, they will slow it down some. I was hoping, in true soap fashion, for Lucious to keep his misdiagnosis to himself for awhile. I'm excited about the hostile takeover arc. I don't think anyone of them could have pulled if off by themselves so it'll be fun to see how they function as a "team" (however shortlived). Lucious is a POS but, in one way or another, he's made them all capable of what they're doing. I look forward to his revenge. I hope Naomi Campbell returns. I was pleasantly surprised by her work in this. Another person with a grudge against Lucious hanging around is always a good thing.

[captain]

I am glad this is back, it's my trashy fun. The Fug Girls recap had me laughing out loud.

Lucious is a great anti-hero, even though I find him extremely icky. "I like you...but I love Cookie."

As a tall, skinny chick who doesn't work out, I'm pretty sure that I could have beaten up Chris Rock. As he stepped off the bus, I was waiting for Frank Gathers to be the guy behind him.

And if someone went through the effort of leaving that box on Cookie's doorstep, why not go into her apartment? It wasn't a problem for her sister and 3 kids.

[GirlyGhoul]

I'm so glad Empire is back too, but I'm doomed to always be behind on it this season (Life super busy now. Esp. on Empire night. *sigh*) But all that whining out of the way, how I missed all the trash and flash this show guarantees each and every episode! I wondered if the dynamic would shift with Luscious behind bars- and while it does have a slightly more Oz/OitNB bent to it setting wise- the behind bars drama is still ALL Empire!

How the heck is Luscious filming himself from inside his cell block??!?! Well... there was a smuggled in cell phone plot line in OitNB that was used to film someone's erm... 'tutu'. So I guess Luscious could have his own contraband iPhone hidden in there somewhere. But I'm not going to waste a whole lot of time pondering the hows and whys because I was too busy falling backwards out of the chair howling with utter glee when he popped up on the big screen all 'Game Over, Bitches!!!' BWAH HA HA HA HA!! Oh, Luscious, I love you, you evil slimey felonious magic iPhone having bastard!!! Never change your wicked ways!!

That said, I'm back to not rooting for anyone. If/When Cookie pulls one over on Luscious and is back on top of her game I will be flipping over in my chair howling with just as much glee and reveling in Luscious's inevitable sulk face if/when (and most likely when) that happens.

I'm not feeling the new and (not really improved) Jamal. Becoming Luscious's Minion and Mini-Me is not a good look for him. Michael is back, and hot photographer is out- probably because Jamal can kick (and hair pull) Michael around easier. He has his own Boo-Boo Kitty now- and while he might think he has his own power, I expect Michael to be just as ineffectual in trying to keep up with Jamal as Anika was in trying to keep up with Luscious. OR who knows, with this show, Michael could turn out to be the biggest mastermind of them all (Still not the best actor though).

But Jamal the Badass has not won me over just yet. He seems to have way too much conscience to fully be Luscious's Mini-Me. Although, come to think of it, even Dr. Evil's own Mini-Me eventually turned on him. So hmmm... Maybe Jamal has an end game up his sleeve we aren't seeing just yet. Carry on Jamal! Carry on my wayward son! (And watch out for Cookie's broom handle!)

Poor Andre and his Lady MacBeth style 'Out damn Spot' nightmares! I miss Uncle Vernon already and hope he shows up like Banquo (or even Bunkie's!) ghost to haunt Andre to the point of speaking about himself in the third person again.

Hakeem? Hakeem still needs smacking! He's so annoying. I thought he would have matured a little bit, but nope. He's still the Justin Bieber of the family. I wanted someone to knock him off his Segway/Hoverboard the instant he rode it into the meeting.

And I guess technically, Jamal (and Luscious) and Marissa Tomei did knock everyone's socks off! How much fun is Marissa Tomei having in her role? I was never a big fan of her, but she sure is finding the scenery delicious and I'm finding that pretty delightful to watch.

On the flip side, I am more of a fan of Chris Rock (not a huge fan, but much more so than Marissa) and I could NOT get into his Frank Grimes ooops Gathers at all. This is the guy Cookie spent most of last season quaking in her Prada heels over? This is the guy who's supposed to be Vito Corleone, Hannibal Lecter and Idi Amin rolled into one? No, sorry! Chris Rock is NOT that guy! Not even on an ironic level. He's too skinny. Too puppy faced (even with the beard) Too 'I know I'm over 40, but my voice still cracks like a pimpled teenager so... fear me...? Please...?' Sorry. They could have cast this little guy and he would have delivered more convincing menace.

That said, I did love Luscious getting one over on him. Ok, it was like watching Godzilla vs. Bambi... but hey still very entertaining. YAY for Empire! Mis-Cast Baddies and all!

[GirlyGhoul]

Oh I love this show!! I so love this trashy trashy wonderous show!!! This season hasn't seemed quite as epic as the first season. But I think some of that is not having Luscious 'dying' took some of the tension out of every moment. Having the family divided between feuding labels wasn't as compelling as it might have been... because even "divided" the family is still so tight with one another. Even Hakeem completely on the outs with Luscious never stops his brothers from having his back. So a Lyon family feud is almost the equivalent of Lucy and Ricky (or Peter and Bobby... or Michelle and Stephanie... or heck the Skipper and Gilligan) running a line of duct tape down their mansion and shouting 'Stay on your side!'.

Still, the show was full of fun, delicious trasherific moments throughout. And now FINALLY Luscious has gotten some karma dumped on his ass!! WOO HOO!!! I knew it was coming, but I NEVER expected who delivered it and how. I won't spoil it here, but I will say if you're behind on this episode, avert your eyes from the guest star credits or you will be spoiled. But still GLORIOUS! REVENGE!!! GLORIOUS TAKE DOWN OF LUSCIOUS!!! MWAH HA HA HA HA!!

I don't think I've mentioned this on this site before- but I have a baby cousin who looks eerily like Terrance Howard. To the point that I do often wonder where Mr. Howard was 9 months before baby cousin was born. But anyway, when things don't go right for Luscious Lyon, he makes the same face baby cousin makes when someone takes his favorite toy or his diaper needs changing. Luscious was in full diaper face mode for most of this episode! MWAH HA HA HA HA HA!!! Perfect!! How you gonna get out of this one Lusci?

Oh and I can't believe I spent the early episodes actually feeling sorry for Anika. She went from Boo Boo Kitty to Bunny Boiler at warp speed didn't she? And I wondered what happened to evil conniving Lady MacBeth Rhonda from last season and why she got so quickly replaced with wholesome, church going, dutiful wife, Earth-Mother-to be Rhonda this season. Oh, ok... so we'd actually feel sorry for HER. I see. I'll try... But in all honesty I'm still a little sore about the fatal bonking of Uncle Vernon. So I don't feel quite as sorry for her as they probably want me to. Plus her fate was such a bad soap opera-ish cliche... (Still glorious television, though)

P.S. Boom Boom Boom Boom Bang Bang Bang Bang almost replaced Drip Drop Drip Drippity Drop as the ear worm most likely to get stuck in my head until a random inmate brought it up this episode. Now they're warring in my brain everytime I try to get some monotonous paperwork done today. Forget who will win Song of the Year?: Jamal or Luscious! Who will control Girlyghoul's brain?: Boom Bang or Drip Drop?!?!?!?

[GirlyGhoul]

Pardon my (triple!) post, but I'm so confused with what's going on with Empire these days. I LOOOOOOVED Camilla's epic take down of Luscious before the hiatus. But now both she and Mimi have been offed- which I find very disappointing, mainly because I was hoping they stick around to continue sticking it to Luscious some more. But everyone who crosses Luscious does not live long at all. I get that he's basically a Super Villain in the protagonist's role and that its in his nature to take down his adversaries with extreme prejudice. But, he needs better adversaries if he's going to stay interesting. I mean, it even took Walter White two seasons of failed attempts before he finally bested Gus Fring. Camilla's plot against Luscious was BRILLIANT- I think the show owed her more than two episodes to gloat before she met the usual fate of all Mr. Lyon's enemies. That actually bummed me out- even though I knew the tables were bound to turn.

So now what's the big nail biter? I guess that Freda will one day find out that Luscious killed her father (Also extremely quickly!)

Also, what is Anika up to? I'm pretty sure she sent Rhonda Miss Scarletting down the stairs- though apparently there are folks in the internets uncertain of who did the deed. But in any case, let's just say it was Anika who offed one Luscious grandbaby so now she's the only one with an heir on the way (That we know of! Jamal's onetime hetero flippity flop could mean another potential Lyon cub in the making...) Why is she still creeping around Rhonda? The damage there is done. You'd think she'd be more inclined to stalk Laura since it's Hakeem's baby she (Anika) is carrying. She had one moment where she dressed up as Laura's chauffeur- but nothing came of that and she's been glommed onto Rhonda ever since.

I mean, she's obviously up to something- I'm just not sure why the plot hinges on Andre's wife. Andre has the least power of all Luscious's sons. Going after Hakeem or his girl or stalking Jamal would make more sense strategically. So I'm just really confused as to what she's up to. Unless, unlike Camilla (RIP), Anika is just really REALLY bad at revenge.

[save lilo!]

How come they didn't have a memorial for both Mimi and wife? Why would they do a memorial for Camilla if they think it was a murder-suicide? Man that storyline went by so quickly. Mimi was just introduced half a season ago!

Frida and Hakeem's girl really aren't compelling enough. I did like Tianna/Laura/Hakeem's song though.

It's really cute the teasing relationship Jamal and Cookie has.

In real life news, Boo Boo Kitty and Tre are married.

[GirlyGhoul]

I want Bad! Bad! Bad! Bad! things to happen to Luscious Lyon!! I'm close to building my own magic portal so I can travel into their fictional world and dump the man in a trash can myself. I hope Grandma 'Lyon' sticks around and continues to torment Dwight in every way possible.

As for the mystery(?) of who made Rhonda go Boom Boom Boom Boom down the stairs. Well if it WASN'T Anika and her Louboutins of Doom, my only guess would be Anika's mom. They could share shoes... or at least taste in shoes. I don't think she has much of a motive since her ultimate game would be to hurt Luscious. But hey, if it's not Anika- who else could it be? Andre's old girlfriend from college? Carol? Becky? Porsha? Thirsty and a secret fetish for ladies shoes? I don't know. It seems obvious to be Anika so I'm not sure why they're stretching it out. I'd welcome a surprise twist, of course. But right now, I don't see who it could be.

Not a fan of Major D-Bag... ooops D-Major I mean. He and Jamal make for some hot scenes behind closed doors (way hotter than Hakeem and Laura or Luscious and that doomed reporter lady... which was just icky!) But D-Major seems like a Major manipulator. I don't know if Luscious was telling the truth that he likes to snuggle up with rich boys and break their hearts- since Luscious is such a liar. But D-Major's 'keep it in the closet' act is plenty reason for Jamal to stay away, hotness or no. Will Major D-Bag come rushing to Jamal's bedside all apologies and sweet nothings? If not, 'Mal needs to find a new hottie to get naughty with. (And probably even if D-Bag does come to his side).

In the meantime, someone please put the Loubotins of Doom to Luscious's backside and send him boom boom boom boom down the stairs into a trash can and then rolling into a manure pile for good measure. Toss Thirsty in there with him for company while we're at it.

[save lilo!]

I can't even -- this show moves so fast. They dragged out the Anika thing and it's all over already? Well if Rhonda offs Anika, at least Lucious doesn't have to worry about her testifying. I'm not even sure what Anika would testify to?? Cookie thinks it's about something Lucious did in the wayyy past, and even Cookie didn't know about it. Also I totally missed Lucious's father being a cop prior to the show banging that into our heads multiple times in one episode. Wouldn't they get some pension or something? Why did he grow up so dirt poor except the fact that his mother was cray? I feel bad for Hakeem but yeah, the show was trying to get rid of Laura *fast*. How come her 'career' was over in 1 episode? D-Major is really hot but so effed up to be yelling at Jamal in front of his OWN FATHER.

[GirlyGhoul]

This show is so crazy, I half expect Anika and Rhonda to hit an awning and bounce right back onto the balcony Wile E. Coyote style. As for the heir to the Empire throne- I'm sure Alicia Keys is going to pop back in again all pregged up with Jamal's flippity flop baby, so Anika's just out of luck if she thinks she holds the one and only Lyon cub.

I laughed so hard at how much wedding dress Laura's dad had to gather up before he could scoot her out of there. It wasn't quite the indignant flounce it might have been if she'd been able to turn quicker out the door. But it occurred to me afterwards that we'd just witnessed a reenactment of the doomed J-Lo/P-Diddy romance. Way back in the day the up and coming Latin sensation and the reigning Hip-Hop King were all set to wed, but someone in his entourage caused a scene and fired a gun at a nightclub and J-Lo flounced (much quicker than Laura did since she didn't have a bulky wedding dress on yet). So I expect next season we'll find Hakeem moping over the news that Laura has landed herself a Ben Affleck type and there will be no escaping their PDA's on every tabloid page. Her career will take off and make everyone at Empire look like fools for not promoting her properly.

And what of Luscious's newly revealed half-brother? Well, since anyone who crosses Luscious tends to end up dead within two-three episodes I won't be getting too attached to this man.