Purple Prose and Other Bad Writing

[Babycakes]

Dec 11, 2018 3:15:30 GMT -4 chiqui said:

"Legolas, by Laura" owns this thread.

I'm almost certain that was written by a malfunctioning android that's never had sex.

[madangela]

So I guess Vaginal Ratchet is my new band name.

Don’t any of these guys realize how clearly they are revealing their ... issues... to the world at large? Each of these masterpieces should simply be titled “MAN I’m Fucked Up.”

ETA I threw out the above before reading the whole thread. Am horrified yet ridiculously amused at the women writing this crap as well. I laughed until I choked at the labia slapping up and down on a cock, or whatever the hell that said. The visual is the funniest thing I’ve ever tried to imagine. I mean, that chick should be able to FLY with those things. Flap flap flap.

ETA again: “Lord Verdigris”?? SNORT!!! Hahahahaha!

[Martini Girl]

Bumping this up to say EL James has a new "Cinderella for the 21st century" novel coming out in two months. I'm expecting it to be god-awful.

[chiqui]

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[Martini Girl]

I take it English is not their first language?

[Ladybug]

Jan 25, 2019 19:18:47 GMT -4 Martini Girl said:

Bumping this up to say EL James has a new "Cinderella for the 21st century" novel coming out in two months. I'm expecting it to be god-awful.

Morbidly curious about how bad this is going to be. I won't buy it, but I'm looking forward to reading snarky recaps and reviews of the book.

[cremetangerine82]

This book YouTuber, KrimsonRogue, read the new E. L. James book.

The OG of bad writing would have to be Amanda McKittrick Ros, who had a husband who could finance her debut novel’s publication, Irene Iddesleigh. Its first sentence?

Have you ever visited that portion of Erin's plot that offers its sympathetic soil for the minute survey and scrutinous examination of those in political power, whose decision has wisely been the means before now of converting the stern and prejudiced, and reaching the hand of slight aid to share its strength in augmenting its agricultural richness?

I guess it about…Ireland?

[Mutagen]

There should be a special medal given to anyone who can successfully diagram that sentence.

[cremetangerine82]

Dec 31, 2021 9:37:45 GMT -4 Mutagen said:

There should be a special medal given to anyone who can successfully diagram that sentence.

Or we should revive this:

The Oxford literary group the Inklings, which included C. S. Lewis and J. R. R. Tolkien, held competitions to see who could read Ros' work aloud for the longest time without laughing.

Wikipedia