Re: Dear Hollywood...

[dwanollah]

Dear Hollywood,

Great job on Lindsay Lohan! Less than a year of A-list fame, and the poor child already needs a "thingie." And a non-egg-white omlette.

Love,
Dwanollah

[Laira]

Sarah Michelle Gellar? Can't act. Stop casting her in things. She's not pretty, she's not talented, she's not funny, she's not clever. Just give her a shiny object and let her go away.

Word. I watched BTVS despite her, not because of her.

Dear Hollywood:

RE: Romantic Comedies

1. Wearing glasses and/or suffering from mild allergies/asthma does not make one an unappealing, groteque, creepy loser who deserves to have his/her heart stomped on, cheated on, left at the altar or otherwise publically humiliated by the so-called romantic lead(s).

2. Dumping your significant other on the eve of your wedding for someone you met three days ago is not cute, sweet, romantic or a sign of a 'free spirited nature'. It is a sign that you're an immature, fickle, unstable jerk. And no, the fact that your fiancee has allergies and/or wears glasses does not mitigate your cruel behavior or excuse that fact that you wasted several years of this person's life.

3. It is extremely unlikely that two people who have never had a real conversation, know nothing about each others' views on politics, religion, money, etc., who haven't met any members of their lover's family or friends, who haven't spent any time socializing, will be able to create a long-lasting relationship out of a combination of lust and romantic fantasies about 'true love', 'soulmates' and 'destiny'.

Please make a romantic comedy featuring emotionally stable, thoughtful, kind and considerate people who don't treat someone they supposedly loved enough to propose to/accept a proposal from like dirt just because they met an attractive stranger and who know that real relationships have a solid foundation

See When Harry Met Sally for pointers.

That is all. Thank you.

*Yes I wear glasses and have allergies. Why do you ask?

[mimsie]

Dear Hollywood,
Please cast Benicio Del Toro in something quick, and stop pulling the plug on all of his projects. He's looking like old shoe leather as he ages and I'm jonsing for at least one more blockbuster with him. Thank you, from Mimsie.

[heyalice]

Hey Hollywood--

Okay, what mimsie said and add Djimon Hounsou to that list.

AND in the remake department? The next time I hear ALL ABOUT EVE remake noises, I will personally make sure those noises are silenced...I'm just sayin'.

One more thing, this weekend should about do it for Ms. Lopez' career, please take note.

[mansonlamps]

Dear Hollywood,

Please make a note that overgrown frat-boy doofuses such as Ashton Kutcher and Ben Affleck have no appeal as movie stars. Not to women, not to men. That's why their movies continue to tank at the box office. Continuing to pay them more and cast them in major vehicles seems like a major waste of money.

Why not cast someone who, I'm just spitballing here, people actually want to pay to see instead?

Just a suggestion.

Yours ever,

Mansonlamps

[whistletops]

Dear Hollywood,

Thank you, thank you, thank you, for Eric Bana and Pax Vega.


More, please!

love and paper clips,
Whistletops

p.s. stop casting people who are only famous for being rich and skanky, and give some REAL aspiring actors a shot.

[Shalamar]

Dear Hollywood:

The next time I hear ALL ABOUT EVE remake noises, I will personally make sure those noises are silenced...I'm just sayin'.

I got your back, heyalice. Such a travesty will not be allowed. Not while I draw breath.

Oh, and Hollywood? Cast Hugh Jackman in something decent. Something which allows him to show off his talent, his voice, and his chest. A female co-star who matches him (or at least comes close) in the attractiveness and charisma departments would be nice, too.

[hillbillylover]

Dear Hollywood,

There should be a finite number of times that the same young actors can have tons of money thrown at them because they are supposedly, "the next big thing. " This should be the case because most are 1) unable to open a movie or 2) unable to do anything worth noting in said movie.

If you are going to throw money away, you might as well give a few fresh faces a chance to catch some of it. And believe it or not, there are attractive young people to be found at places other than the WB.

Some of those found on Broadway, can actually act!

Thank You,
Hillbillylover

[Coffeecakes]

Dear Hollywood,

Thank you for Eric Bana. Now that I have thanked you, truly make me love you by casting him opposite Monica Bellucci or someone with some damn sex appeal. Make the movie with some heavy duty sex scenes. Get on that now. Remember, when shooting Eric, you must remember that there must be chest, arms, ass, and if you can, get a full frontal shot.

Thank you for your time,
Coffeecakes

[roxpopuli]

I loved this thread over you-know-where before it was locked! I never got a chance to post.


Dear Hollywood,

Just because you make them wear glasses and labcoats and carry clipboards doesn't make us buy untalented bimbos as brain surgeons, anthropologists and nuclear physicists. We aren't that stupid, so stop treating us like we are.

Love, Rox