Mystery Science Theater 3000

[proper stranger]

iceblink said:

I love how Riding with Death just turns into a completely different movie in the second half, too. Suddenly there's no more riding or death!

Pod People pulled that trick, too. It was like three craptastic unrelated movies rolled into one ("Meanwhile, in movie B...").

Speaking of Pod People: "IT STINKS!!!"[/color] (Or, if you prefer, the Joel n' the 'Bots version[/color], complete with Frank in a "I'm a Virgin" T-shirt.

This show made "TOR-CHAAARRR!!!" so much fun.

[Deleted]

When Mike jumps out shirtless with a shoelace tied round his forehead and starts stepdancing a la Michael "Lord of the Pants" Flatley, I laughed so hard I cried.

Favorite line: Can't remember the title of the Russo/Finnish movie but this girl is praying to the sun to not come up yet, because her wicked stepmother threatened her with some hideousness if she didn't finish a chore before sunrise. CREW COMMENT: "BEEP! This is the sun. Your message is very important to us..."

Next favorite line: Guy running up endless flights of stairs. CREW COMMENT: "I put the bathroom on the top floor? What was I thinking?"

Next favorite line: Prince of Space (?) where the head villain is lining up his guys to go march somewhere. CREW COMMENT: "Ready, mince mince mince." (And I swear I heard "Has anyone seen my dick?" in reference to the tightie-tight uniform pants.)

Good times now available on DVD.

[january]

Favorite line: Can't remember the title of the Russo/Finnish movie but this girl is praying to the sun to not come up yet, because her wicked stepmother threatened her with some hideousness if she didn't finish a chore before sunrise. CREW COMMENT: "BEEP! This is the sun. Your message is very important to us..."

Hee! That was Jack Frost, another classic. I love when she thanks the sun for helping her out, and Mike says, in his Vito Corleone voice, "Someday you'll return the favor."

That whole episode is awesome. With the little mushroom guy, "Are you freaking out yet?" and the hero turns into a bear...and the house with legs...oh, man. What a trippy movie. My best friend and I have been known to shriek, "BRING ON MY DOWRY!" at random moments.

[Mutagen]

My friends and I like to imitate Crow imitating Jack Frost speaking to himself: "You worthless piece of crap! Like something I'd scrape off my shoe!"

Speaking of insane Russo-Finnish epics, I've always been partial to The Sword and the Dragon:

Kid in movie: "Mother, I have found my father." Tom: "Did you follow the trail of beer cans?"

The doughy hero: "The gods were witness to our love." Mike and the Bots: "EWWWW."

Narrator: "The Tugars (aka Mongols) ravaged the land. Pillaging. Burning." Tom: "Itching. Flaking."

And the incredibly loud, shrill brass soundtrack which Mike refers to as a "concerto in D for car horns."

[india7]

What was the one about the astronaut who went through some kind of weird space accident and kept progressively melting after he came back to earth? I think it was actually called "The Incredible Melting Man"! Mike & the Bots had hilarious lines during that one!

During a close up of his melted up face: "Incredible Melting Man is made with pudding so he's moister!"

Then there's a scene where he gets up and begins attacking this nurse, who looks like a drag queen in nurses uniform anyway. But she starts running from him, absolutely SCREAMING her head off, the nurse's cap falling off her head, but still hanging to the side by a single bobby pin, her drag queen makeup all smeared while she's running. And Mike & the Bots are imitating her: "You'll preserve my dignity in this scene, won't you? I have my career to think about - you won't make me look ridiculous, will you?"

I love the Ben Murphy movie! Not sure if it was Riding with Death, but there was one when he's leaving a bar, and walking past this dark alley. Suddenly a couple of bad guys jump out and start beating the crap out of him - Mike and the Bots go, "We'd like to talk to you about Scientology!" And for this board in particular - that's a big HEE! ;D

[Deleted]

Hey, maybe someone can help me out here. Was there some episode, in the early-to-mid-90s, that had one of the bots saying, "Puma. Puma? Puma!"? Or did I totally hallucinate that? 'Cause that's always a possibility.

It was no hallucination. That strange movie with the "Puma? Puma?" call is Ring of Terror. It was a Comedy Central episode with my beloved Joel. It was about this (OLD!) student (actually, all the students were old) who isn't afraid of anything... except for the dark and dead bodies. As part of his fraternity hazing ritual, he is made to go inside a morgue and steal a ring from a corpse's hand. He gets freaked out by a cat (who is named Puma) and dies. Oh hilarious. The whole thing is set up in a twilight zone style with an old man host who keeps calling to his cat, Puma during the introduction.

This thread is making me remember how much I enjoyed the Mike episodes. I always like Joel better as a host but so many of the films during the Mike years were simply bizarre. That Christmas movie wher the Devil tries to get kids to be mean so they don't get presents is just truly strange. Santa lives on some weird rock planet and has fake, robot toy reindeer. WTF??!!

Also, Skydivers, where all they seem to do is skydive. Seriously. Hee!

[gauss]

I'm strangely partial to Warrior of the Lost World, staring the Paper Chase guy and Persis Khambatta. It's an absolutely horrible cheap 80's post-apocalypse Mad Max-type rip off, but Joel and the bots had so many great lines!

Fugitive Alien also had some good moments. I especially liked the skit where Joel did his impersonation of Captain Joe's sudden mood swings.

[Deleted]

"Riding With Death"?
Ben Murphy (or whichever trucker) on CB radio: "Comin' up on yer mud flaps at 55."
SOL (whoever): "People have such cute names for sex."

[january]

thursdaynext said:

Also, Skydivers, where all they seem to do is skydive. Seriously. Hee!

Wasn't "Skydivers" the one with Petey Plane? All the characters were having a party of some sort, and there was a shot of a little single-engine plane that kind of looked like it had a face, and Servo gets all happy and says, "It's Petey Plane!" and he sings this jaunty, happy Petey Plane song. For some reason I remember the Petey Plane thing made me fall to the floor laughing.

Between "Skydivers," "Red Zone Cuba" and "The Beast of Yucca Flats," Coleman Francis is an MST3K All-Star. I love "Red Zone Cuba" for its fake Castro alone. (Mike, all sarcastic: "Yes, that's really Castro.") Good times.

[Deleted]

I remember one (can't remember the name) that to this day has us singing this silly song Mike and the guys made up.

It was a 50's movie set in some high school. One bot comments that the freshman is like, 35 years old. LOL

But anyway, at a break the bots and Mike dress up in these 50 style blue jeans, dance the twist and sing :

"I'm rock, rock, rock'n my Toughskins"

We still do that round the Falcon's Roost.